You can’t help other people or be there for your loved ones if you don’t take care of yourself first. When you’re tired, rest. When you’re agitated, see where you let someone cross your boundary. When angry, take care of your inner child that wants to be heard. You and you alone are responsible for how you feel and what you need. Go inside, be with yourself first. You deserve to be loved and heard but you have to love and hear yourself first. See what’s going on inside, speak out, ask for help. You don’t have to do it alone. This is what taking responsibility over your life means. We take care of our inner world so that it doesn’t mess up our outer world. 🤍

When we feel something, wether it is old pain or pain in the present moment, we have two choices. We either feel it, share it and heal it- with this we empty ourself out and get back to a base line of peace and serenity. Or we push it away and create stuck energy that will work as an engine on the mind that will produce thoughts. It will give you a temporary (false) sense of relief from the pain but at the same time sets off a mechanism that needs to produce more and more thoughts to keep you away from the pain.  With this mechanism running at full speed, it will only be a matter of time till you get stuck in illusion.  When we are stuck in illusion we are believing in our own thoughts and perceptions and we are setting off the train towards destruction. 

Spirituality is transcending the world of the mind, the world of illusion. We do not hide it and we do not fight it.  We are not trying to win or overcome anything. We simply transcend it. We do this by keeping our eyes wide open and learning to see trough the illusion. We will come to know where the mind has still power over us. We will come to know that even that power is illusion and the so called power it has over us, is the power of the unfelt feelings. 

Feel your way to freedom 🤍

When you are feeling resistance, struggling to get the work done and see yourself acting out old behaviors. Procrastination, complaining, blaming, people pleasing. Ask yourself, is it worth it? Is it worth to run from this moment so that you don’t have to deal with what is. What is will remain, even if you run from it. The only thing you are doing is wasting another day of your precious life. 

Imagine the dreams you have.. for the future, for tomorrow, for now. Whether it is being a mother or having your own business or being a teacher or a nurse. Picture it and ask yourself is this what I’m doing now getting me closer to my dreams? Your dreams and all that you want are closer than you think. The solution is right here, right now. Press pause. Surrender. 

To work towards your dreams doesn’t require massive action or radical changes. on the contrary.. it requires rest. Pause. Be still. Do the foot work and let the universe handle the rest. You are worth it🤍

When you feel disconnected and the mind takes over. You have to press pause. Re-connecting to yourself is only possible in the present moment. The best thing that all spiritual teachers have thought me is that the mind will always make you believe that re-connecting, resting, finding peace, being happy etc is always in the future. Which never comes because it doesn’t exist. When the mind takes over and we are disconnected, we try to find ourselves in others, in substances, in work etc. Seeking, wanting, grabbing. Looking for gratification. A sense of release. Looking for completion. Sometimes it works, for a little while. Until that person, work or substance doesn’t act according to my needs and wants….. o boy. 

The only release you are looking for is the connection to your soul. That’s the only completion there is. Connecting to the true nature of who you really are, That’s were all the seeking ends. You will feel whole. You are home. 🤍

When difficult situations arise, make yourself aware that you are not in control. You don’t have  to fix anything or figure out everything. 

The harder you try to be in control the more fearful you become and the struggle will only be bigger. 

The only thing you have to do is become still. have faith, let go and let yourself be guided. That does not mean you become irresponsible or don’t care any longer. it simply means  you stop living in the past and future with worries and what if’s. You Stop reacting to things that do not even exist; fears and worries are products of the mind that do not exist in the reality of the here and now. Instead you live day by day. Moment to moment. You decide what needs to be decided, you act when action is required. Other than that, you remain silent. Don’t react and don’t use too many words. Find the silence in yourself in de midst of all that is happening and your life will change dramatically 🤍

Be vulnerable, speak your truth, say what you mean and mean what you say. Its not always easy to say what’s going on inside you and tell someone what you need and want, but its the only way to let someone in and to give someone a fair shot at being with you. The real you. Not the person you would like to be or think you need to be. it’s also the only way to be happy and free. Don’t leave yourself for anything or anyone, the right people will stay and love you the way you need to be loved. 

Stay true to yourself and all else will fall into place 🤍

Believe me when I say, you got this. 

You got this. You can do this. 

All the things you want, you desire, you need; you got this. The only thing you have to do is believe in yourself. Believe in yourself so strong that others can not help but believe in you too. 

You came all this way, you fought your way trough everything. 

you are overcoming trauma, fear and self doubt. You were underestimated by yourself and others but you are here now, further than you could ever imagined and nothing is holding you back to accomplish everything you want. 

The only thing that’s in your way is your mind, who is telling you the direct opposite of what’s true. That’s the only thing you need to know. Don’t listen, don’t care. 

Breath.. go inward. 

There is a force hidden inside of you that is so strong, so powerful. Tap in to it. 

Tap in to it and connect. Connect to that part of yourself that is connected to the whole universe. Keep doing this over and over again, this way the mind will lose its power and your main source of energy will come from your higher power. The wisdom within will start working for you and self doubt, fear and worry will disappear. These are all products of the mind and will disappear as soon as you stop feeding it and you stop feeding it by choosing God everytime the mind starts taking over. 

Turn to the source within, believe in yourself and you will be unstoppable 🤍

You know what it is? All of the answers you are looking for are already inside yourself. There is nothing to do, nothing to attain, obtain or get. It is a matter of becoming still and learning to listen to the voice within and let yourself be guided from the inside out. Stop listening to other people’s opinions or so called good advice. Stop listening to the mind and its judgmental attitude. Other people and their experience are a great value on your path but only to direct you to that place inside yourself where your compass is leading you. We are so afraid to trust ourselves but it is the mind who cannot be trusted, we ourselves are intuitive beings who are guided at all times. 

When we learn to connect with that deeper part of ourselves where our intuition is guiding us, trust is a natural result. Trust in ourselves, trust in others and trust in life itself. Because we are no longer depending on others to make us feel good or save us. 

We can take care of ourselves and make our own decisions and we do that with the love and guidance of other people’s experience but we are not becoming like one of them or try to live the same life. We are becoming our own true authentic self and with that peace and happiness is a natural result. We are not trying to be something or someone anymore, we stop fighting. We embrace who we truly are. 

Life is not a matter of becoming someone or something but rather unbecoming all that you are not 🤍

There is no way I can describe the freedom I experience inside. It’s not even what I feel. It is what I am. Complete freedom from head to toe and even beyond that. No limitation, no sense of time, no pre fixed sense of identity. Just being. 

There is no worry about what people think. There is no thought about who or what I am, what I have to be or what I have to do. 

I am here to play the roll that is assigned to me. There is nothing to worry about. With Everything that happens there is a complete acceptance of what is. It is what it is. That doesn’t mean you are passive. Not at all, you act when needed but you don’t think about it. You act intuitively and with extreme confidence and determination because there is no doubt. Only trust. There are no coincidences in Gods world. There are no mistakes. Everything that happens, happens for the purpose of your freedom.

Complete peace is the results of this ultimate surrender. Nothing and no one can ever come between you and this peace because this peace is who you are. De emotions and feelings you experience are just a result of being human but underneath that human experience you can always feel your true nature which is peace.. freedom.. happiness. 🤍🩵

"Some of us tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil” BB Alcoholic Anonymous 

We have to be willing to let go of our way. We have to realize that our way is not the way to freedom but rather the way back to were we came from. It’s not easy to let go, it’s terrifying and uncomfortable. But if we do not get willing, nothing will change. Sometimes our will seems so powerful and it feels like we are a 100% right. But in reality it is the ego trying to get you back in your old shape again. How ever difficult it is, let go of self will, and just trust. Trust the people who have walked this path before you. Trust your higher power. Trust the book were it is al laid out in such simple manner. We do not have to do anything else than the book says. Keep it simple.. trust is the key to success. 

Today, I will trust my higher power. I will trust that by letting go of self will and self centeredness, a new life and a new way of freedom will be the sure result I get 🤍

Learning to live without holding on is the toughest thing you will ever do. It’s also the most freeing thing you will ever learn. No attachment and no desire to what ever life has to offer. You can enjoy everything that comes your way but you don’t cling to it. You don’t depend on it. You let go whenever the time has come to let go. Without regret and without doubt, you experience and you let go. We never question reality and we don’t rewrite stories. Everything is exactly as it needs to be and even in the subtlest thing there is a lesson to learn. It’s your willingness to see this that determines your growth. Don’t ever think things should be different than they are. Everything is exactly as it needs to be and your willingness to accept that is the amount of growth you will make everyday. Resisting reality will only slow down the lessons you have to learn and will make them come back in different shapes, forms and colors but it’s always the same lesson. Dare to see it and dare to live life as it comes instead of trying to change it. Let go of what it looks like on the outside and live from that place inside yourself where humanity meets the divine. Where fear and control do not exist and where freedom is your natural state. Don’t try to prove yourself to anyone or anything. Know in your heart that you come from a place of love, honesty and purity and you will live a life of freedom 🤍🩵

Be grateful for whatever happens in your life. Even the painful stuff.. the heartbreaks, the losses, the hurt. Be grateful because you never know what it prevented you from. You don’t know what the universe protected you from or where it is redirecting you to. You simply don’t know and you don’t have to know. Maturing spirtually is about not needing answers for everything, being ok with not knowing. Its about understanding that Answers wouldn’t liberate you and knowledge is just mind clutter that will not get you anywhere. Its the wisdom from within that drives you to the places you need to go, without words, without explanation. let go of wanting to know; Listen to your inner teacher, let yourself be guided and be grateful for whatever comes your way. This is freedom 🤍

Many of us lived in “the problem” for most of our lives. Claiming we were desperate and at the end of our ropes we entered twelve step programs or something else that could help us. But I remember when the solution was presented to me, the gift of desperation seemed to have left me and I was back in my old ways quit soon. Choosing the solution and working on it every day is a challenge. We become “too busy” or “too tired” to work the steps. It’s fear of the unknown that makes us resist living in the solution. Letting go of what was and trusting what will come. Because even tho there is peace and freedom on the other side, it’s still unknown and unpredictable and that seems to scare us. 

we have all these ideas of what our life should look like and we chase it over and over again, not realizing that our life is now. Only now. 

The solution to our problem is now , our life is now. Not tomorrow or when I “feel like it”. I don’t have to feel “good” to do the work. If I want better I will chose better. Now. 

If I take good care of the present moment, I have nothing to worry about for the next moment. 🤍

If you don’t know what loss is, you don’t know what love is. If you don’t know what pain is, you don’t know what pleasure is. Pain is a part of life and running from it makes it only harder and more painful. In order to turn your pain in to power, you have to face it first - Feel it and release it.

Try saying thank you to the people that hurt you, the people that made your life hard and challenged your whole being. Say thank you because that is what made you stronger. That is what made you the fighter you are today. If I didn’t go through hell and back I wouldn’t know how to be this way now and never back down. Fighting, pulling through and not backing down have nothing to do with other people. It is and always will be only about the courage to face yourself. That is the only real battle there is. Everything else is only a temporary distraction. You can put people, events, places and things between you and yourself but there will always be a time that you have to confront that which you are running from. Real fighting and real courage lies in facing yourself. 

So I want to say thank you to every scar on my body, mind and soul -  no matter how they came there. If it was done by other people or by myself. In the end you will see that everyone is a beautiful being and we are all trying to make our way through life the best we can. I say thank you because it made me exactly who I am today and I wouldn’t change one bit of it. I love others for who they are and I love me for who I am and there is nothing in this world that will ever change that. 🤍🩵

It’s all about love. We all crave for love. Self love, love from our parents, friends, our partner.  Why is it then so hard to give or accept love?

We say resentment is the number one offender of the spiritual life. It closes down the heart. The heart is the center of our world, where the divine and humanity come together. Where love is received and where love is given. When the heart closes down, the mind will take over and the dark colored glasses of the past will take over. We will live life from a point of fear instead of love. When we live life from a point of fear, everything is set towards destruction. nothing will survive under the relentless grip of fear. Fear is disguised in many forms; anger, irritation, restlessness, discontentment with everything that is and extremely unkind and fearfull words and thoughts. 

Resentment is the outcome of this. But it starts way earlier down the line. Where did your heart close off? Where did you decided you didnt want to get hurt again and allowed your heart to shut down? Everything that happened after that is a result of you closing down on love. You lost faith and by losing faith you automatically chose fear. 

Dare to go inside - feel the blockage. Open your heart. Be honest, open and willing and your life will turn around in an instant. Life is too short to live in pain and love is the answer, always. 🤍🩵

I made the decision deep down to love unconditionally. That means, even if I get hurt - I won’t hurt back. I got my values and my moral to live by and not anyone els’s behaviour can change that. I learned it the hard way. I was a puppet who reacted to everything that was done to me. If I felt lonely, I blamed you and looked for other company. If you lied to me, I justified myself to lie as well. Not knowing that I was lying and hurting just because I was lying and hurting on the inside. In the end it had nothing to do with the other person. I was just telling myself that and justifying what I was doing because it didn’t made any sense. i didn’t want to hurt other people, why was I doing it then? To avoid Facing myself- my fears, feelings and desires. 

By doing the work it all changed, It gave me the oppurtinity to face what was going on on the inside. The courage to share that with people I trusted and it cracked the whole downwards spiral into a million pieces. This gave me the opportunity to choose my actions. I am no longer controlled by what other people are doing to me. I am no longer reacting to what is done to me. everyday I make a decision - I love unconditionally. Myself and others. With every fear, feeling and desire that is there. Its all part of the package and I embrace it all. Good and bad, Darkness and light - This is freedom. 🤍🩵

I always thought I had to be somebody or do something to keep people in my life. I had to be the perfect friend or the perfect girl friend or what ever the situation was asking of me - I had to be perfect - so that I wouldn’t be abandoned, rejected or left alone.

The only one who was truly abandoning and rejecting me, was me. What I was longing for was my own attention, my own love and my own accountability. I wasn’t longing for some one to always be there, I was longing for myself to always be there. I constantly lost the connection with myself and in a response to that I looked for myself in everything outside of myself. And guess what? I was no where to be found. When I had the courage to face the feelings that were underneath the seeking, I finally found what I was searching for all my life. Me!

I learned to give myself what ever I thought I wanted from others, and that way I learned to trust that who ever wants to be in my life, will be there. Everything that belongs to me will be there and will make its appearance as long as I live in faith instead of fear. 

People don’t leave you for being yourself and if they do than they never belonged in your life in the first place. You should never have to work hard to show your worth to keep people in your life. The right people will know your worth, feel your worth and reflect it back when you forgot about it yourself. Be yourself and the right people and things will fall in to place. 🤍🩵

Love like it is the last day you see each other. Treat everyday and every moment like it is the last. Because you know what? It can be. You never know what happens, tomorrow isn’t promised and yesterday will never come back. Look at how your world changes when you value what you have, right here right now. It’s so easy to look at what we don’t have or what’s not good enough. Judgement and expectations rule the day. The real strength is lying in appreciation and gratitude but why is it so hard for people to do that? It’s because it makes you vurnarable and open. It makes you realize what you have and you get open to the fact that you might lose it. It’s all about fear. All character defects - demanding, criticism, judgement - it’s all fear. if we would value what we have we are opening ourselves up to the world, to the other person and to the fact that we love someone or something and that we don’t want to lose it. That’s the most vulnerable position you can have. At least, if you believe what the mind is saying. In reality it’s the strongest position you have. To be right here, right now. To know what you have, to know what you want and be honest about it. If we push away feelings, they have power over us. If we act out of fear and let our character defects rule our life - what we do, say and want are not aligning with each other which creates confusion and disharmony. It also makes sure that you do not get what you really want and need. 

We all deserve to love and be loved. We all deserve to be seen, heard and cared for. And it all starts with seeing and hearing ourselves. What is it you really really really want ? Listen to you inner world and be honest and open about it. Dare to speak your truth. Speak your feelings and show what you need and it will all come your way. See yourself first and you will be seen by the world 🤍

`

Every thought has its origin. It comes from somewhere. It’s a reaction to a feeling inside. We have automatic thoughts and created thoughts but even the automatic thoughts are evoked by an energy which we mostly call “feeling”. 

Nothing comes from nowhere and your thoughts and the words you speak, should direct you to what is happening on the inside. Not the content of your thoughts, thoughts are useless if you dive in to them. But what is the energy behind the thoughts ? Is it jealousy , resentment , condemnation or has it a critical undertone? This will point you towards what ever thing you have to work out for yourself 

If we take it another level deeper - there is only one substance in this world and that is love. Under all layers and wrappings, there is love. So when someone makes a mean comment or you notice certain thoughts inside your mind , remember this; there is the word itself , there is the feeling underneath the word which point to where you or that other person is stuck and then there is the source of the word, the person and the feeling - and that is love. 

You choose what you focus on. It’s literally your choice every single second of the day- love or hostility. Love or criticism. Love or separation. do you focus on the solid foundation and the beautiful core of someone or do you focus on the temporary form someone takes. If you chose to see the good in others, you will grow to see the good in you. If you see the good in you, everyone else will too. Love for yourself and love for others- This is where true freedom starts 🤍🩵

If you sit still. Breath. Pause. Notice what is happening. Notice the movement of the mind to try to “find” something. Distract itself with this or that. It wants to search and find, search and find, search and find. The mind is a seeker. This simple observation of yourself shows you how all distaster is created. All trouble in your world stems from your mind who has the natural tendency to search for something and you yourself think it’s because something is to be find. You literally give yourself the feeling that somewhere out there is an answer to what ever it is you want to find. it comes down to this; you search for yourself in everything. The more powerful the seeker is searching for an answer the more you lost the connection to yourself and the more obsessive you search. But there is nothing to find! It’s a ghost hunt every time you let the mind seek, you will hurt yourself or another. Every answer you are looking for, every thing that you ever searched for is literally on the other side of the seeker. It’s you, the real you. All the answers you are looking for are inside you and not any where else. The mind goes in every direction except for the right one —> inside! The only way out is in 🤍🩵

Faith, trust, union.. love.. 

All words that weren’t in my vocabulary in the past. There was no trust no faith and there for no real love. Fear and love cannot co-exist. You chose either the one or the other.

I chose recovery because I loved my son so much that I wanted him to have a good life and most of al a safe place that I never had myself. But After I experienced an enormous amount of pain that was done to me and my children I chose recovery for myself. Something in me made the decision to love myself unconditionally and to never lose sight of myself again. What ever storms may pass, what ever obstacles will come- I will stick with me. That was the first movement of unconditional love i experienced in my life.

The second one was when someone came in to my life where I, from the first instant, experienced the same trusting and deep feeling that I had experienced with myself a few years earlier. I took a leap of faith and went against all I believed was true. There was no fear and no doubt, only trust. And now that unconditional love and that eternal feeling of trust are the foundation of our life. we come from union instead of separation. And no seemingly storm is really worth the doubt because we know that all that is thrown at us can never break the bound that is created in union and unconditional love and is blessed by God. Nothing that is unreal can threaten wat is real. Believe that and the mind will never overpower you again 

Faith, trust and love 🤍🩵

isn't it madness that we expect other people to behave a certain way while we ourselves are not able to do so? Isn't it madness that we focus on how other people should handle a certain situation, grief a certain way, act a certain way, react a certain way- while we ourselves have no idea what we're doing?

The picture we paint about how others should behave is merely the way we want ourselves to behave. We would love to react to people with dignity, respect and compassion. To not lose ourselves in emotions and to always be "in control", but that is simply not reality. Freedom is not about being perfect. It is complete and utter acceptance of who you are exactly at this moment. Including emotions, reactions and certain behaviors. Acceptance of where you are will make every amount of suffering drop away in an instant. That's why freedom is always found in the here and now and why it is ALWAYS there. It has nothing to do with how far you are on your journey or how much trauma you have dealt with. It is and will always be only about the amount of acceptance of what is. Acceptance of yourself exactly as you are, here and now. Acceptance of your life and the whole package you live in. If there is no resistance, there is no movement of the mind. If there is no movement of the mind, there is no past or future. If there is no past and future there is no "me" to complain about "myself", "my pain" or "my life". Or what the "me" likes even better is complaining about "you" 😂. 

if we completely accept ourselves as we are, we will be able to accept other people exactly as they are and we will focus on what we can give ourselves and what we can give them instead of the other way around. We start to think about how we can care and love our loved ones instead of how they should threat us. Love will come back automatically when you start giving it away without rules, expectations and demands. You will see that the people around you love you more than you think and that the more that you accept yourself, the more you can appriciate the way they love you.

Acceptance is freedom - it's your choice to be🤍🩵

There is one fact in this world that can never change and that is that all what you experience is an experience on the inside.  Everything you feel or think is inside you. It can be evoked by others, it can be triggered by others but it is experienced by you. This is a blessing because this means that as long as you are not afraid of your inner world - you are completely free of the actions of others. 

When someone or something triggers you, you can decide to walk away and not meet that person again. But you can also face the feeling that arises. Whether it is fear, hate, love or sexual feelings - it is all energy. The moment it arises, turn towards it and accept the feeling exactly as it comes. It will be released right then, right there. Emotions are energy in motion and the only thing it wants is to be released. If we push it away or we cling to it, it will get stuck and it will have power over us. If we are afraid of our own inner world anything and everything has power over you. The only thing your inner world needs is your attention. The moment you give attention to your feelings and sensations, it will be released and that is the only thing that is needed but the ego uses shame and guilt to make you run away from what is happening inside. Like you are not suppose to feel or think certain stuff. The truth is, you can’t help what you’re feeling and you should accept yourself completely with every feeling and every condition you’re in. Acceptance of yourself is the only way out of the mental prison that is constantly surrounding you.  You are okay exactly as you are. your feelings are okay exactly how they are. It’s what we do with them that makes the difference. 🤍🩵

After a while you understand the importance of taking care of the people around you. Your own wants and needs aren’t that important anymore. You understand that being good to the people around you and taking care of them are the same as taking care of yourself. Love is only one stream - when you give it you get it and when you get it you give it. It only becomes unhealthy when you are trying to fix yourself trough other people. Then you are seeking yourself in someone else or in a relationship and the result is the opposite- you will lose yourself. This happens when there is no self esteem and no self love and this is a results of not being connected to the source of life but instead living life from the egoic point of view. Doing the inner work makes sure your inside gets as pure as it gets and all your actions and results will show that. You will never have to convince anyone of anything because they will feel it. Including yourself. The days of proving yourself so tirelessly are over.  You are good as you are and self love will come so naturally that there is no other option than to give it away.

Stick to the golden rule - treat others how you want to be treated yourself. Don’t get lost in desires and needs. There is so much more to life than what we think we want 🤍🩵

This burning sensation in the heart, this uncomfortable feeling that you would normally run away from, this is your doorway to the deeper layer inside yourself. It may hurt and it maybe sucks but it means you are able to love someone deeply and if you are able to love someone deeply, you are able to love yourself deeply. In times of separation or struggle, you have two choices; Either you turn outwards and you self destructively search for comfort and ease or you turn inwards and go to the place where there is the only real safety and comfort you are looking for. You. 

The key is self love. Give yourself the love you so desperately want from the other person. The deeper layer inside is obscured by pain and fear. loving yourself in times of pain and discomfort is the secret of healing your way into the spiritual center, where you are free of suffering and where love is the only real thing 🤍

Everyone has a spiritual foundation. The ground of which we all come from is anonymous and 1 and the same. No identity, no I, self or me. Within that ground a thought arises, the “I” thought. Which, after a million years of conditioning, brings the feeling of I with it. This is what ego means. It is nothing more than a thought about self which creates the feeling that there is actually a separate self. 

Truth is we are one and the same and always will be. The separation we mentally create between each other shapes the world of restlessness and discontentment because something is always missing. The connection with everything breaks when we believe in the separation and we go on a fruitless search to recreate this connection in everything we encounter in life, while in reality it’s only one breath away. Breath to the heart, give your heart all the attention it needs to reveal all that life has to give because it is no where to be found outside of yourself - it's here and it always has been. 🤍 🩵 have a great day 

Being free of the experience of hurt 

There wasn’t s lot of love in our family. it was being mad at or being ignored. it was a constant battle to be seen, heard or loved. I know now that it is so much more than that. The moment I think that something so bizar is happening- that someone is behaving the direct opposite of what I am longing at that point - is the exact moment that what needs to happen happens. Don’t stare yourself blind on what is happening on the outside, the outside has nothing to do with it. Don’t hang yourself, your life or your feelings up on someone els. let what is happening on the outside, push you inwards as much as possible. The more someone is hurting you (as the mind will call it) the more that person is helping you to reach the absolute bottom of your own being. And guess what? That’s where true freedom is. 

Cut yourself loose of all the ties you have on the outside. Let people have their ignorant, mean or judgemental behaviour. They hurt themselves more than they hurt you. Let the longing for love push you inwards to the place where only true love exists- in your own heart. And paradoxical enough that’s the place where all guilt and resentment towards other people will disappear completely and only love will be left. Love for others and love for yourself. you are free the moment you, not only KNOW but also experience that what ever someone is doing : No one is hurting you, no one is abandoning you - you just couldn’t see it yet.

Self will is the one who “thinks” he has the power to decide. The one who “thinks” he is in control. It’s the thinking that is the self will. In real life - self will can never change the course of life, only the experience. It is always, ALWAYS God who is doing the controlling. If you go right but think you should’ve gone left - your wrong. God, for what ever reason, made you go right. The self will is the narrorator who claims power and who claims to make the decisions and beats itself up for it. Always afterwards and before hand. Never in the moment. 

Self will is the illusion that we have a choice and the one who is claiming all actions and outcomes. While in reality everything that happens is God who is taking you through life. It’s your willingness to see this that determines your amount of freedom. Self will is nothing more than the voice in your head that claims everything. 

Everything that happens is suppose to happen and everything that is suppose to happen will happen. This is living in complete peace.🤍

Loyalty is not determined by using the right words in a conversation. Loyalty is that which we do when no one is looking. That which we are when no one is paying attention. That which we say when no one is listening. Loyalty is not a thing you choose when it is convenient, loyalty is a lifestyle. 

Honesty is the most important ingredient of recovery, of life and of love.

Without honesty you have nothing to build on. You can only built on reality and reality is seen trough honesty. dishonesty is the foundation of every illusion. In the illusion we are self seeking and self centred. We think everything is about us and feels like an attack or an insult and we do all kinds of things to set this straight or retaliate. If you catch yourself doing this- think about where it started? What was the moment the first link of the illusion was created. Where did we made a decision based on ego to be in this position now. You can only set it straight and come back to reality again when you see the beginning of it all. This is according to the big book the way to stay awake. 

Prause pause, ask for direction and you will be shown the exact nature of what is happening and then the footwork will be laid out again in a clear and simple matter. This is the path of peace which is easy to follow when you have hope faith and a whole lot of courage 🤍🩵

I’ve always been very strong. Even when I was a little girl. I still don’t know where I got the power from to get back on my feet every time while life was such a painful ride. Well.. I kinda know now. It was God and it always had been. 

I had this fire in my heart which i was always able to feel - I smiled and shined most of the time and in times of immens pain I turned darker but I could still feel that little burner inside of me. But there is a loneliness in my heart that is unexplainable. It’s so deep and so massively painful. Is screams to be held and loved. It screams for you to come and help me. I screams for togetherness and safety. It’s not a loud scream. Not anymore. The gap is filled, the shortage is taken car off. But still there is this yearning.. No one can hear it. Except me. It doesn’t scare me anymore. It’s there always. All the time. And when I am left alone or treated poorly, it comes and visits me in the dark lonely hours. No one hears it and no one can answer the call for help. I can’t even ask the question anymore. I guess I asked it many times but it was never truly answered because it isn’t supposed to be answered by others. a human being could never answer this call. The emptiness isn’t meant for humans to fill.. 

the darkness couldn’t be driven out by the material world. It’s only the light that can truly take over. The emptiness is a God shaped hole.. come and help me, I beg you to take me with you and never let me go

The spiritual life is not a theory, we have to live it”

Don’t live on yesterday’s solution. Today is a new day- today you have to step into the solution again and ask for direction for this moment. Let go of what happened yesterday, let go of yesterday’s knowledge as the mind will only use it against you. Trust that everything you learn will be inter grated as long as you let go and you trust. Yesterdays words and solutions are todays weapons of the ego. Let go and be open for a new day, a new experience, a new world. 

Everyday is a chance to be in perfect union, body mind and soul. The more you are united with the divine within the more peace, rest and utter happiness you will experience. You will feel self love and confidence because Your actions will be aligned with your words and your words will come from a place of love. This is true strength and courage and it’s only one decision away. Chose the solution, chose honesty, chose the real you. 

Trust, breath, let go and LOVE 🤍🩵

Doing what you say and saying what you do.

that doesn't mean you have to do every thing you say. It means you are honest about the doubts in your mind, the fears in your life, the wants and needs of your soul. the course of life can change in any moment, that's how it should be. But being led by guilt and shame we don't dare to speak up about what we want and need and hide behind what we think is right and try to carry that out. That's not integrity. You can't know what's right- you can only feel it.  Listen to your authentic self, find the strength to go from there and integrity will be the definite result.

Years ago my strategy was to withhold love. Withhold it until im sure you like me enough that I can give back little bits and pieces of this same love. The same love I am craving for from the other person I kept within a closed heart and opened up only when I felt safe enough to do so. And by this I created a false sense of control. But not only did I create a false sense of control, I also created a literal distance between myself and that which I loved. I created what I feared the most, the sense that I was losing that which i wanted the most. Because of this arm length distance no one is able to come as close as your heart needs it. You will resent people for this while in reality you are the one keeping everyone at arms length waiting till they have proven themselves to be worthy of your love. It’s a painful and tiring process.

What if we just break the walls down and give away exactly that what we want the most? Love, closeness, safety. And this has nothing to do with being together or reassuring each other all the time. It’s about the stream of love that flows trough the heart that beats 24/7.  It’s about daring to open your heart instead of shutting it down when things don’t go as we planned. It gives a real sense of safety and security when someone shows you their unconditional love. Maybe you can’t promise each other for ever but in this moment you can give forever. Do that each moment ,again and again and you will experience the most pure form of love- without fear, without attachment and without demand.. just Free, safe and warm love. 🤍🩵